Past, present, future...

“Stop acting as if life is a rehearsal. Live this day as if it were your last. The past is over and gone. The future is not guaranteed.” ~Wayne Dyer

“You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present.” ~Jan Glidewell quotes


Have you ever gotten caught up in the past? Not like a flashback, but a moment (however long) where you thought about the past and the emotions of the past felt as real now as they had then?

Yesterday, I was out with 2 of my closest friends celebrating my friend's birthday (Happy Birthday K!). Since we have known each other for more than half our lives, and had been drinking martinis, it's no surprise that we began reminiscing, talking about our teenage years, university days and everything since. Funny memories, sad memories, happy memories...16 years of memories.

I don't have a very good memory. I have friends with photographic memories. That's not me. I remember major events and people, but I don't remember details. This is why I take lots of pictures! Yet, though I don't have a great memory, I do think about the past a lot. Sometimes I get caught up thinking about things that have happened or choices I've made that I (at one point or another) have wanted to undo. There are a few things in particular that I tended to dwell on. Choices made that forever altered my reality...Toronto or Ottawa? U of T or Waterloo? Work or travel? Travel or work? Study or write? Right or left? Yes or no? I have sat for hours thinking about each detail, wishing I could go back, even pleading with God for just one do-over LOL

But, as we sat talking yesterday with 2 of my closest friends and our significant others, I realized just how far we truly have come, how much we've changed, how quickly we've grown. And with this realization came another thought. That it was the choices we made then, in high school, in the past that had gotten us this far. That even though there are things that we sometimes wish we could undo, every moment of our lives is a life-altering decision. There are no small decisions. Everything happens for a higher reason beyond our comprehension. Every thing in this universe is connected. How arrogant to think that a decision I make could have a "life-altering" decision. There are no big decisions. Life will happen the way it is meant to and ultimately it's up to me to remember the good times and make do with the rest. In spite of life's challenges and heartache there are blessings to off-set each. Blessings come in many forms...every day is a blessing. And there's no need for do-overs :)

“What you need to know about the past is that no matter what has happened, it has all worked together to bring you to this very moment. And this is the moment you can choose to make everything new. Right now.” ~Anonymous